Last Year Was the Year I Fell
Last year was the year I fell and couldn't get up
We hoped and we wished but it was never enough
It started with you and I ended alone
Last year was the year I fell on my own
I learned to forgive but I can't forget
I learned to give all that I could get
I learned it's your heart that makes you beautiful
I finally experienced a heart that was full
So quickly I learned how it all could change
I watched the people around me suffer losses with shame
We lost you and I learned how cold the world was
It was real and it was everything they didn't tell us
Last year you broke and subsequently I did too
I watched you suffer not knowing what to do
You made me feel helpless inside
I'm sorry
Last year was the year I fell
Fell for all the tricks and the lies
Fell for the stories and the sadness inside
Submission to the dark
In a world where the light is hidden
I learned and I grew but I'm still not where I need to be
You taught me what I need
I felt love and I felt hate
I was confused and needed an escape
I wanted to be everything all at once
And was overwhelmed by the feelings that overcame my heart
I was lost and still remain unfound
But I got back somehow
I allowed my mind to go to all the places I know
And opened my soul to the places I wanted to go
Somewhere through it all I got some clarity
And saw life in all its brevity
Last year was the year I fell
Last year was the year I fell
I had finally started to get up
And believe I had it all
That things weren't bad after all
I was happy too
With the people who cared
Or at least seemed to
Last year I learned
I learned what it meant to be a true friend
A sister
A daughter
No difference between them
I made a choice of who to let in
And regret nothing since then
To love and to be loved
By whomever is in
Last year was the year I fell
I watched a world fueled by hate
And people engulfed in its flame
I watched the best of us fall in despair
Longing for a world that may no longer be there
Last year it felt distant
People were not the same
We were far apart
With many reasons to blame
Saddened by the hate I still believed in love
In a hope of something coming
Something greater than us
Last year was the year we changed
Beneath it all I feel brand new
I'm not the same person I once knew
Last year I grew and you taught me how
Last year I loved the best I know how
Last year was the year I fell and picked myself back up
Even though the battle felt tough
Last year I learned who I want to be
I fell and became the best me
Last year was the year my life changed
For better rather than worse
Last year I was happy and sad and confused
Last year I found my muse
Last year I fell deeply in love with myself
With my skin with the world
With the color yellow
And with you
Last year
Was
The
Year
I F
e
l
l
This year I have no intention to