Iridescence

I long to feel you,

      every day that you have been gone.

Your clothes stay folded in your drawers,

      my phone never rings,

            your drum set collects dust,

      as every long day goes by.

Your car grows older

      sitting idle in my aching driveway.

I lay

      where you once slept.

My face rests

      against your once used pillow.

In my journey of life,

      I am now on my own.

My hands hold on to

      the memories

            of your presence

      as coldness grows deep within.

                  A blur

my life,

      as each day goes by.

The empty caverns

      inside me,

Toss my heart

                  into cascading depths.

The arms

      all my own,

            attempt to soothe my

inner being

      against its battle with the pain.

Those words would never leave

      your lips again.

            The words,

      I miss you,

      I love you.

Life is about finding love,

So how can I truly live

      if I have no one to love?

I want to be,

      put out of my sorrow,

            and to be shown who

            I truly was inside.

I still hold on to the memories

      and sometimes I feel my life is through,

      think that only you can save me.

Somehow, I still realize,

Despite my torments and burdens,

that through the resonating pain,

      through the abandonment

            and my empty home,

that loss is tricky.

I know now that.

      only I

can set my heart free.