I'M TIRED!
I'm Tired of caring for someone who doesn't care for me. I'm Tired of sharing my feelings and all i recieve is pain. I get on the game everyday always be feeling the same.Cause all my friends do is play the game.All i ever wanted was somebody to talk to about my feelings.But it seems like i will never find the one.They say theres somebody for everybody.But i never had anybody. At this rate i don't think i ever will. Every night i talk to myself and i ask myself what is wrong with me. I never get an answer i just wait til i fall asleep. I'm Tired of pouring out my feelings and always be recieving pain.All i ever do is find somebody thats not the same.I am starting to give up on this LOVE thing its drivin me insane.Everyday i always hope i will find somebody.But everyday i realized that i am living in a fantasy.Because in reality all i ever find is nobody. I always get rejected every time i think i have a chance. I am always left with a broken heart and a low Self-esteem. I am starting to think love is nothing but a fantasy. I'm Tired of always being a friend.thats all people think i am.Every time i tell her i like her.She will reject me and that'll be the end. Sometimes i have a dream that i am in a happy relationship. i feel so happy like life can't get any better. Then when i wake up i cry because that feeling i felt was a feeling i never felt. and sadly i never will. Sometimes you just gotta face facts.Theres not somebody for everybody.cause if there was i would've had somebody.but everytime im alone.the only thing i can think of is that i have nobody. I have decided that i am never going to find a relationship. cause its not going to happen. it would've been nice to have somebody. but too bad that i have nobody. One night i was thinking of what to do about these negative feelings i felt.My mom told me "if i ever feel some type of way write it on paper."At first i didn't no what she meant, but now i understand.if i didn't express these emotions i would've been more of a broken man. My Parents are in the process of getting a divorce.It used to hurt me to know that my parents are seperating.But now i am numb to the pain.Even though i think i can't feel pain from it somehow i still think it effects me. I have had dreams of when my parents were happy. Then i wake up mad and upset. I feel like my life is going into a downward spiral. The negativity overpowers the positivity. The only thing keeping me sane is appreciating the small aspects of life. I hope in the future, happiness will comeback into my life.