Every day, millions of us take a deep breath before stepping out that front door. We take a deep breath before walking up to our friends, talkign to new people, putting on that smile. We take a deep breath as we brace ourself for that filter - but not the one that most people have come to hate. We put on the filter that protects us. We put on that filter so we don't have to face our fears. 

When I told you

that I wasn't scared

of anything

-that I hadn't been scared

for a long, long time-

you said

you wished

you were the same.

 

All at once,

memories came back

of lying on the bathroom floor

trying to stop the bleeding

ribs poking thorugh my skin

begging death:

"Please! I'm not scared, I'm not scared."

 

Because when you lose fear of death

you lose fear of life.

 

And I wish I had the words to tell you that.

But all I said was "Trust me, no you don't."

As if the answer was really that simple.

Which to the drunken girl,

thin and bleeding on the bathroom floor-

it was.

 

(e.g)