Fear of losing peace
I opened up, I let you in
No matter the mistake nor sin
I sacrificed my dark nights and long paragraphs,
My giggles, “scuffs”, and laughs,
for someone who might not last
Our days are getting shorter
But the weeks are getting longer
Starting to miss the times where we grew founder
He showed me what it meant to feel at harmony with my self
How to balance that shelf
Between love and hate
But now I know it’s too late
For any redemption
Because he was the only exception
He understood my incoherent verbs that flowed throughout our 3 am phone calls
He allured my conflict as if they belonged to him
I took him in when I appreciated his underestimated intentions
He took me in when he understood my eccentric behavior
Having bad days meant nothing
When it was a good day with him
But now I feel obligated to delete the yellow heart next to his name
But if I leave what does that make of this?
Another broken time frame
Another broken promise
Another broken pattern
Another broken heart
He calmed me down like he was the moon and I was the ocean
We were a symphony
A symbol of promise
A symbol of peace
Because he was my peace
From throwing dishes to angry parents
From family issues to weekly breakdowns
He showed me peace can be found even in the darkest cracks of this corrupted world
He showed me what peace felt like
Holding his hand was like holding the warm, torrid sand
But I felt the sand getting colder
The sand started to run through my fingers
And as each grain of sand slide from my fingertips
I felt him flee with it
His Moonlight highlighted the flaws of my ocean as if they were perfections
But The moon and the ocean were not in harmony anymore
The difference between the ocean and the moon is that the moon can live on his own but the ocean stays dependent
It’ll live in chaos
What if I’m the ocean
What if I can’t handle losing my peace?
But that’s the gist, I have to.
I can’t rely on you anymore, please
Now I have found my own moon
My own peace