I have faith in a God

      But He has never spoken to me

I have held on to the idea of love

      But love has never kept me and no one has ever aimlessly loved Alyra,

I believe  Freedom is most important

     But I have never felt free, and I am always enchained by the opinion of others and so I've never been myself

I know self-love is powerful

But find I critique and study every character flaw and evey flaw in my reflection

I think optimism is key to sustaining any situation

   But find I am the most pessimistic person I know

I know sinning is bad

   And still I weigh the option of wrong and right in my head always 

I'd wish to be happy but find I self-pity 

 and I am always the hardest on myself

And so always I am at odds with what I'd wish to be and everything I am not.