Even Though I Said I Wouldn't
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EVEN THOUGH I SAID I WOULDN'T
Even though I said I wouldn't go back to his ways, his yelling screaming and pounding. I said I wouldn't let him touch me until he got tested. Even though I said I wouldn't let him whisper soft loving things in my ear, then tell me later I'm trash.
Even though I said I wouldn't let him back in time and time when the cops chased him and locked him down. I wouldn't let him step all over me, and use my body like his own personal toy. Even though I said , I wouldn't I let him beat me because I have lost all my power in fighting back. If I gave up he would too. I let him tell me what and who to do, and where to go.
I let him tug on my inspiration that wouldn't fight back and erase my dreams that cried endlessly. Even though I said I wouldn't let him back in I did. When I lied to my friends "he's sober now". I cried at night almost every night, I felt alone, dirty, and used. Even though I said I wouldn't let him back in after picking up my own pieces. Even though I said I wouldn't doesn't mean that I meant it. Even though I said I wouldn't write this, but I wrote it anyways. So if you’re reading this I'M DEAD NOW , EVEN THOUGH I SAID I WOULDN'T LET HIM KILL ME , I DID IT MYSELF
D’asia M.