drowning,

help me, I’m

drowning

 

the salt laps at the seams of my skin

the biting wind, my stinging cheeks

my body submerged

confined to a world

free from the weight of gravity

and yet, still falling, still

 

drowning,

I’m drowning

please, I’m

 

so close to the surface, but

below awaits the perpetual abyss

an endless darkness

I can’t see the bottom, knowing

something is there, not knowing

what it is

that infinite unknown

 

I’m petrified, and

 

I’m drowning

please,

I’m drowning

please help me,

I’m drowning

make it stop

 

I’m drowning

 

I can’t see,

I can’t hear,

I can’t breathe,

 

I’m alone, and

I’m drowning

 

in a halo of distorted light

peering back at me through

a barrier I cannot breach, with

no one there to see, nor

to reach beyond the surface

and into the depths

to lend a hand, a line

a breath of fresh air, and

 

I’m drowning

still drowning

 

please,

I’m drowning

help me, please

 

with each gasp my lungs fill

with glass shards, with thick sludge

with anguish, with desperation

every cry for help drowned out by water

drowned out by noise

by artifice, by deceit

drowned out,

drowned, I’m

 

drowning,

I’m drowning

please

 

I’m petrified, and

 

I’m drowning

don’t,

I’m drowning

don’t give up,

I’m drowning

don’t stop breathing

 

I’m drowning

 

I can’t see,

I can’t hear,

I can’t breathe,

 

I’m alone, and

I’m drowning

 

drowning,

yes, I’m

drowning

 

drowning

 

the creeping of microscopic shadow

a marine snowfall of organic debris

suspended in a heavy ink

 

only drowning

 

the glow of iridescent light

a cacophony of stars ensnared by the deep

drifting beside me

 

merely drowning

 

drawn by the current

I let myself fall, down

further down

this underwater jungle

this lost city, this

veiled blue planet

a halcyon cosmos

where my weary bones rest

 

and my eyes are open

the salt stings, the view is blurred

but my eyes are open

 

triumphant, and

hardly drowning

astounded, and

barely drowning

free, but now

 

my eyes are open, and

I am drowning no more

 

This poem is partially inspired by Claudia Grutke’s acrylic painting, drowning in ice, depicting her abstract interpretation of a melting glacier (see image above)