Dear Insecurities,

You are a force that I cannot reckon with,

You have sat there and broke me until there was nothing left but dust,

Left me empty with nothing but a hole inside of me,

I tried to fight against you but found myself beaten up with cuts and bruises,

 

You are deadly,

Something that makes me cry until my eyes are so swollen that I am unrecognizable,

You feed me these words that make me self-conscious about everything,

You are the leading reason for my anxiety,

I cannot fully enjoy myself because of my constant fear caused by you,

 

You affect my relationships,

You have made it hard to love me,

You are why I cannot accept a compliment,

I dream of the day where you don’t take over my life,

 

Because there are days where you don’t affect me,

It gives me hope,

Then there are days where your words hit me like a ton of bricks and I just want to shut off my brain,

My hope is shattered and there is no light within my eyes,

 

I live my life reaching out for anything that makes me smile,

I live my life at the end of your hand,

One day I will defeat you,

One day you will no longer be something that runs my life,

 

One day I will be free.

 

Sincerely,

Me