You give me comfort in everything you do.

Your words dance around in my head like a cloud of dazed smoke. 

I don't wince at your touch, even when I don't want to be touched.

You're the exception to the rule. 

I want to break down so you can see me. 

But,

I know that will be too much for you to bare.

Right now, I can barely let myself go, 

even when I'm alone.

Please don't turn into him. 

Into another manipulative being.

Someone who gets joy out of my pain. 

A king of sadistic need you feel the urge to satisfy.

He's broken me.

And I don't expect you to be the one to put me back together again. 

All I ask it that....

your touch continue to comfort me.

Your words continue to soothe me.

Your being continue to protect me.

You continue to do everything you do, for me.

Maybe one day you'll read this and understand me the way that not many have had the chance to.

But for now,

I'll just let the idea of you and me dance through my head.

Being wrapped in your words, all in that same cloud of dazed smoke.