Compliments

 

age 7

Schoolyard pick always had me on edge

I wouldn’t be first, always chosen towards the end

Neighborhood boys dressed in nike and converse

Would snicker and make fun, without any remorse

So I sat out all alone, thinking I was the one to blame

Wondering why I couldn’t be a part of their game

A game of muscle of man, so tough SO dreamy

“Go home, there’s no point, you’re not going to play anyway”

I walked home silent, thoughts in a whirl

“I didn’t want you, you throw like a girl!”

 

age 17

The first time I had sex, he left the room to high five his friends

I was still, naked and shaking alone in some bed

But the Monday that followed, that Monday was worse

the whispers and stares followed me as if rehearsed

“Did you hear what she did? Wow, what a whore.”

but “Props to you bro, how long did it take to score?”

My phone is buzzing, it won't stop ringing

Texts range from 'Hey babe, what ya doin later?' to 'The Lord knows you're sinning!'

I think we all know the end of this story

A character dies

 

the other basks in glory  

 

age 27

If you asked me what I loved

I’d first say Philly, a city full of buzz

And then Id reflect and think of the times

I was too scared to walk home because of some guys

“Damn sexy! Hey! Listen! You’ve got a nice rack!”

“Holy shit girl! Yo, do you sit on that ass?”

I take the long way home to avoid your crude calls

Head down, headphones in, but no music playing,

Fast paced is how I’m forced to walk to block out what they’re saying

but I still feel the goosebumps as you examine and debate

 

the parts of my body

 

when did it become okay to have my body put on display

for your wondering eyes

your amusement

your satisfaction

Because I'm damn sure this isn’t for me,

your dirty stares cause me to shower twice

just so that I can try to sleep through the night

 

 

If I could change something, girls would grow up, still throwing like girls

No longer defined by a thin string of pearls

If I could change something a young lady could have fun

No longer feared of being judged

If I could change something it’d be the way you act

No longer calling after me, informing me about my body as though it was fact

If I could change something I would walk home at night, a smile on my face

No longer worried about having to pick up my pace

I look for a change that would restart the world

Because we know this story has already been heard

 

And I will no longer be told

 

 

“Smile sweetheat,

 

it’s a compliment”