Beaming Yellow

Layers of makeup coat my anxious cheeks,

Tutus glimmer under the incandescence.

An eerie silence follows applause,

Then darkness pours into the wings. 

I am forced to face my fate.

Wide-eyed and paralyzed by racing thoughts,

A numbness I cannot break,

My legs rush onward without my head.

No, no, no.

I cannot move; don’t make me.

Blue shocks rush up my arms,

I am pushed on stage. “Go Abby.”

The world stops. I am suspended in time.

My heart jumps and I gasp for air.                        

Ashamed by the fear encompassing me.

Twisting melodies penetrate my ears,

This is it: Fight or flight.

I lick my lips. I breathe. I release.

Time fast forwards and I am present.

Exposed in front of everyone,

I confidently push through movement.

Soaring into the chill auditorium air,

Cascading downward into place.

A sensation of joy overcomes me,

Embodied by yellow.

Yellow rays shoot out my fingertips and chest.

I am Beaming. I release. I just dance.

My arms swirl like yellow ribbons,

My legs as sharp as a yellow spark.

I feel my mind slow and my smile grow.

I am not afraid.

This is me in purest form,

Lost in the music, victim to the song.

A timid artistic trapped in worries,

Set free by the fluorescence of spotlights.