An Apology Letter to Myself
I’ve known you since you were born
Your fingers equally intertwined with each other
Eyes, big and brown as the skin it lives in
Curls of hair, built like a single heartbeat reviving a lifeless body
And a smile that is overly sensitive to everything it touches
Just like your damaged heart.
Danielle,
I’m so sorry.
I told your heart that you were not worthy of being loved
That you were too dark to be a light
That you were too fat to walk the straight and narrow
And you should just stop speaking
Because no one wants to hear what you have to say
Made you wish you were someone else
Made you think that no one cared
That no one would actually love a fat dark skin black girl like you.
Danielle,
Your light is not broken, it just ran out of batteries
Danielle,
If you were that ugly, the mirror would already be broken
If no one really cared, you wouldn’t be thinking about how others see you
You’re not fat, you just have extra layers of protection
To keep you from feeling the pain the world gives you
And your skin is handcrafted by God Himself
So stop questioning His greatest creation.
You’re beautiful
The way you laugh,
How you think
The way you love
You’re beautiful
And I love you.
It make take some time to get use to hearing those words.
But in time, you’ll see what true love looks like.
And it looks like you.
With Love,
Danielle