Anxiety

Location

30428
United States
32° 12' 41.9544" N, 82° 40' 11.8092" W

Without hesitation, he attacks me.
I worry every day, every moment,
If he will strike again.
Living in fear is no way to be, yet
I must say to myself constantly:
Breathe. Nothing can hurt me.

I prepare myself everyday
Before going out
Confident he will stay away,
But I know of his relentlessness.
So I must say to myself not once, but more:
Breathe. Nothing can hurt me.

An incident occurs: a simple, clumsy mistake,
And a crowd has grown near.
Feeling all eyes burning into me,
Embarrassment takes its toll.
Without a glance I know he’s there - creeping behind.
Still through this I manage to say:
Breathe. Nothing can hurt me.

I panic, knowing what’s to come.
I’ve encountered him before,
Yet I still don’t know what needs to be done.
My heart races, sweat trickles down my face.
A heat arises so strong it’s suffocating.
He closes in the walls on me.
I don’t know why, I don’t know how,
I thought I would feel no fear tonight.
But as always, he comes as a surprise. And I say:
Breathe. Nothing can hurt me.

He grips my throat mercilessly.
My lips quiver - I try to break free.
Weak screams manage to escape,
Not from fear, but shame.
All eyes still on me, I gather the strength
To finally break free.
My face, red from his attack, doesn’t cool.
His grasp upon my neck never loosens.
I run ashamedly through the crowd and retreat
To the confines of my home
To regain the breath he stole from me.
I assure myself once more:
Breathe. Nothing can hurt me.

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