am I crazy?        

so I've been fucking told!        

        

I always thought I would save the world from pain.        

trying to keep our children from being fucked over and over again.        

literally        

        

I hear the screaming of the rabbits in my brain.        

finding it hard to differentiate my screams from theirs,        

I see me with that lead pipe as I bash daddies head to pulp, smashing his smug, all knowing smile         

        

I don't refrain from hearing the voices in my head,        

telling me kill, kill, kill him, smash him till he's dead.       

yet his evil ghosts still won't leave my mind.        

for gods sake daddy,   i see you awake and in my dreams        

        

my daddy loves me        

        

You'd be crazy too if you had to listen to your father fucking anything that moves         

        

Or try watching movies at the drive-in with your parents        

kids in the back seat         

Clothes your eyes kids        

NO WALT FUCKING DISNEY for us        

the documentary about sadism and masochism playing in our ears                      

it's only for adults      

LIARS        

like my father really needs instruction        

        

Try living with the crawling hand worse than the movie one.   Sit on my lap cream puff, wheres the vasoline?        

god, I hate the non smell of vasoline, his lotion of choice.        

        

Oh mama mama, where for art thou mama?        

mamas cooking, cleaning, going to church.        

praying to god for my evil soul?        

        

Using your self blinding manipulations!        

your Black hole in your memory mama ?       

you are the BLACK HOLE!       

        

What? you cant see daddy in the cars middle seat?        

smothering me because I bite hard?      

smashing my lips with a hand full of         

'This will hurt me more than you daughter'        

    

Now i get to wear a permanant crack in my lip to forever remind me of our LOVING family camping trips and force fed alcohol        

THATS RIGHT DADDY!  I'LL BITE THAT MOTHER FUCKER RIGHT OFF        

        

mama stops the car, so I can puke his cream of the crop    

out the door        

watch it, shaunda        

those could be your future  brothers or sisters.        

FOR GODS SAKE HOW MANY MORE DOES HE NEED        

        

move every six months so no one sees the monster for our father        

        

i gladly pee and shit in a can in my closet because the bathroom is no longer safe,       

I see you waiting in the dark living room daddy        

I'D RATHER SHIT AND EAT IT before I use that bathroom again.        

        

what? if i dont let you do me,   You'll get my baby sister?        

and when I hear her screams, I'll know it shoulda been me!        

        

dont tell on daddy or hell go to prison        

who'll take care of us then        

we'll all be adopted out, never to see each other again        

        

liar liar pants on fire        

get me in the sack        

beat it blue and black        

    

as daddy smuggly smiles        

and mama hides her eyes        

        

I can't take it        

every day,  every minute        

I'm so afraid.        

so i'll just slit his throat while he sleeps        

        

im just a little girl        

im so alone      

please help me god  

  

God must be asleep  

WAKE UP GOD PLEASSSSSE  

gods too tired        

        

And mama wants to know how I ever got this crazy?        

Well fuck you mama and the dick you rode in on.        

        

I cant take it anymore        

my brain is cracking from all the people screaming in my head        

Saying I'm better off dead        

      

am i fucking crazy?      

so ive been fucking told!        

        

And I smile...........