This is not just a hobby

No, this is therapy

THis is my private counseling session

Poetry is the classroom and my pen is the lesson

And my mind is the curriculum and I am the board of education

And music is my inspiration

When I sit with a paper and pen in my hand basking in contemplation

Poetry is how I teach myself about who I am

My game plan

My real feelings and emotions causing commotiions through my mind 

As I try to find the answers to my questions from my poetic lessons

And the thing about this is...

Poetry is all I have left

My salvation in Christ and poetic talent is what keeps the balance in my life

Because everyday I have to fight and to make things alright

I must write to release the resentment and anger and pain 

And exhaustion from fighting to be the best

Failing and falling hard causing an unrelenting aching in my chest

And the only to escape is to write 

Poetry is all I got left

Past memories of traumatizing times and moments so bitter it's like sipping wine

But I have to be strong and stand tall above the rest

So I walk with open wounds no one see but me

Poetry is all I got left

That's it.

There is nothing else or that's just how I feel

And the blows keep coming so I never get to heal

I know God's got something out there for me 

But I'm exhausted and my mind is giving me a vital warning

But I keep walking

And keep writing

Because God is all I got left