again and again and again......



morning on a sunday in hanalei bay

underneath the palm trees i lay

underneath the long, skinny leaves to give me shade

look out to the water

hear the crashes and the foam of every wave

on the right, my parents play 

on the left, tossed sand from christian, i dont know when he will ever behave

~ / ~ / *close my eyes* / ~ / ~

now its night time 

and the bonfire's the only visible light

run toward it but it becomes a distancing sight

look down at my feet and the water greets

blink for a second and now i cant breathe

water fills my lungs and my toes sweep the top of the coral reef

i cut my feet and now i bleed and it stings

the surface im now struggling to meet

i look around and see everyone in canoes extending their hands out to me

i reach out too but my hand goes through theirs and i cant seem to reach

tentacles and hands grab my ankles and pull me underneath

to god knows where in abyss of the dark deep

and i scream

and when i hit the bottom

~ / ~ / *wake up* / ~ / ~ 

"not again......"

"this is the tenth....."

~ / ~ / *go to sleep* / ~ / ~

morning on a sunday in hanalei bay....




Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741