I am

So

Absolutely

Terribly

Sorry.

This light

Generated by my screen

Isn’t enough to

Fix me

These words

Help

But not

Enough.

And if

I could

Start over

Re-evaluate

Everything I

Had said

I would

And i would go at it

With love

And with compassion

And with grace

Three things

I absolutely missed the mark with.

I am

Sitting here,

At 12:52

6/11/17

With shame

I am

More than acquainted with

Such an old accomplice

But here we

Are again.

I would

Do anything to

Make things okay

I would write

A thousand poems

And sing a million

Songs

And i would

Say i am

Sorry until

I couldn’t say it anymore.

I’m sorry

The colors of my soul

The harsh liquid

silver

Of my emotions

And anxiety

Ran away and

Took me with it

I’m sorry that i

Tried to make

You see what i

See, and

May have made you look at it

With disdain

And I’m sorry

If you look at me

And see insecurity

Ignorance

Stubbornness

And see me

In a warped way

Now

The only reason

I said anything at all

Was because i cared about you

And still do

And i don’t know if

That matters to you

But it matters to me

Forgive my pride

In thinking that you would still

Care for me

Because nothing is promised

But won’t you forgive

And understand my hurt

That i can’t sleep tonight

I can’t

Close my eyes

Without feeling like a fool

Without

Feeling like you will

Slowly slip

Into the distance

Just like everyone else did

Forgive me

For being overdramatic

I even feel foolish

For putting my thoughts down

With hope that

M

A

Y

B

E

   you would be able to forgive me