A wise author wrote "Pain demands to be felt"
It's inescapable like bullets with no names.
They come so fast and cause so much pain but yet the shooter feels nothing.
But the boy who lays face down on the ground and nobody stops or waits around to see if his body was sound lays alone in his own blood and this causes a flood
The calls come in swiftly and you call your friends to see if its true and the screams that surpass from your mouth are not as painful as the tears that roll down your face south.
You sit in your lap and rock back and forth crying and no one is home to hold you and say it's ok so you burry yourself in your music and you try to latch on to those final conversations that you held in relaxation.
And you slowly ask god why and whisper I'm sorry
Time goes by and you think you've healed and now you can manage some of damage but another loss gets added to your baggage.
It hit your heart harder than losing a friend because she was family. She was a mother, a grandmother, a sister and a wife.
You scream and cry on the floor and question what is life and why does it hurt you like a piercing knife that only by the grace of god can strife.
You lay on the floor and remember every amazing moment of her beautiful soul and your own body never felt so cold.
You wanted to sing at her funeral so she could hear your voice from above but the words couldn't pass your mouth so you spoke instead about how family is important and we shouldn't gather for weddings and funerals only. Family should be together in any type of weather but some still won't even dare to call our mothers.
The pain hasn't left your body and some think its absurd but now your body must deal with the loss of a third.
It hit the whole family hard especially your father... especially his daughter.
This time of life is inevitable & painful.
And we deal with it all even when we rise don't be surprised when we fall.
and that's the thing about pain.
It demands to be felt.