be careful what you wish for

they say

like propaganda vhs tapes

plastered on the projector

they would never know

that i spent every day for years

waiting for the clock to hit four ones

so i could robotically wish for you.

an imaginary version of you, but still you--

someone whose story i can't put down to go to sleep and

someone who reminds me of everything i could bury my face into and

someone i'd give up everything for.

it's supposed to be wishful thinking 

to dream of feeling

buried in all the layers of the sunset

through someone else

but i know how it feels

to melt in your arms

during every number on the clock

without having touched you at all.