‘Inside of me’

Fri, 08/17/2018 - 23:45 -- SanCan

You have not known how many years I've waited for this,

For you maybe, yes you can say that. Or maybe the feeling you light up inside of me.

The funny fuzzy feeling, like all the colors from the rainbow gently pulling every string of my soul.

Nor do you how many places i've been in search for you,

In Fact you don't..

And for every broken element of me that screamed and wailed everyday for someone,

You werent there for me,

Nor were you there when i sat alone, just digging deep into stuff i probably shouldn't have into,

Getting more sad day by day, my shots in the dark were all astray.

Did you ever hear me calling you?

Even a whisper perhaps because, trust me I went into the most crowded places to find a familiar face.

So now that you're here, can i say how much i missed you?

How many tears tumbled down my face for just a glance of what you really looked like,

Like an exotic deer somewhere in the wild,

Hoping to find the serene scent outside of himself,

While not realizing that the scent he wants to catch is not out there in the crowded bent crooked trees,

But within himself,

So hi, you made it, looks like my shots in the dark hit your heart

It took you a while but i guess this is how it was supposed to be

Now you are here for me, does it sound a bit desperate if i say

“Please don't ever leave me again”...again, as in i felt you within me, but never with me.

Sorry but right now, i'm way too scared of all the scars on my heart,

Touch them all and tell me you’ll fill them,

That you're just not a fragment of my imagination.

But don't ever tell me to leave my past behind

For i know i fell into that dark hole,

A place i'm sure Alice couldn't have found a way out.

but i saw you pull me through it,

But listen love,

I was the one who looked up at the light when every part of me was crashing down,

So here, she was strong yet she needed a sign, a sign to pull her through,

There you go, let me in and let me be,

I think i might not need you, set me free?

Cause oh well, i think i found that “someone strong” inside of me.

 

This poem is about: 
Me
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