So covered in wounds

I became one 

to all that I loved, to all that I knew.

A very vicious cycle of abuse.

 

It felt like I was walking in my sleep

and woke up from a murderous dream

to a gruesome scene;

severed limbs and blood on my hands

and I could do nothing more than cry

as I laughed.

 

Here I was; all alone

with their hands, legs, and heads to hold.

The nightmare was a making of my own.

 

Flesh of death,

bones of sorrow,

and inside I was hollow,

                             hollow,

                                hollow.

See,

all my life I wanted more:

a sky of blue for me to soar,

a boundless sea to make my heart roar,

every mountain for my feet to climb,

every forest of oak, cedar, and pine,

every star that ever shined 

Oh, I swore

all of the earth would be mine.

 

Glorified and exalted all creation 

 

but knew not of whom it was created.

So I made a choice to let the light shine through

this vessel I now call

Adieu

for she bids farewell to the moonlit highs

where she foamed at the mouth

as her eyes rolled back white,

where she dared not to cry

for her flesh,

   her flesh,         

her flesh,

burned bright.

 

In the dark I was a star,

the brightest to burn by far,

so in the dark I chose to stay

feeling life was but a game,

but even stars pass away,

even stars fall from grace.

 

 

Oh, how they all star gazed,

my soul like diamonds in the blackest of caves.

 

But did you know,

a star’s it's brightest as it's core implodes,

so as you gawk it suddenly explodes

that supernova is now a black hole.

 

 

 

 

 

Yes, I felt it in my soul; 

100 billion degrees of desire

fusing gold, silver, uranium, and iron

but before you know it there's nothing left

except a blackness that is immense.

No light can escape its accumulation,

 beware of the pull of temptation.

 

So I left the night and woke to day,

my skies went from black to grey.

Trying to send the clouds away,

I isolated myself and began to pray.

 

O dear father, take my shame, 

my bones are hallowed by your heavenly name,

heal my soul, kill my flesh

every day I will do my best

and they shall call me 

À Dieu

for all my being will be trained to bring

glory to you.

 

Here  I am 

and yes I've changed.

With God's help, I've climbed out of the grave.

I've fixed my eyes on things above.

I've been healed and am learning to love.

I've asked for mercy, 

I've bared my shame, 

I've forgiven those who've caused me pain.

These gruesome tasks made me weary

but I've grown so much, 

O, my soul 

God truly did carry.

 

 

Bless the Lord!

O, my soul

you've let yourself grow in His glow.

So when they see my internal glow up

Oh, I'll know it's you.

In your eternal love I've been renewed.