They bit the apple on the tree and I smoked its leaves. Yet, the sins I committed outside my body weren't enough for me. I kissed her lips and touched her skin. I cut my flesh for my dead spirit within. Red love dripped deep for lust as I drooled like the dog I truly was, over two females of my own species with large busts and wide hips. Late nights making love to my oppression with a handful of pills that sat  left of my love letter that starts with satan and was signed with The End. Pill after pill at this point I could no longer feel. waking up I found myself still  in my sins. I couldn't forget how little I ever meant. the cycle would repeat again and again. The new beginning always came with an old sin for me to reminisce with. It was like my enemy and yet my bestfriend. But at the end it came down to me and You. You, who's cuts bleed for me, HE who hung on a tree.  He who saved me... me? I didn't even believe. But He spoke to me under that tree when she kissed me. He told me, "if you don't stop, you'll have to die before you ever get to know Me." I chose her over Him and He still chose me. The wretch, the "faggot", the addict, the depressed, the atheist, the dog, the roman who crucified Him apon the cross and put nails in His  hands, thorns upon His head, and the stabs to His  back just like Judah did. The one who ridiculed You when You were dead. Worshipped my own god like Jezebel had.  But by YOUR grace You forgave me and remade me, by letting Yourself be crucified in my place... How amazing! Thank God for mercy! Thanks God for grace! Because now I cant wait to see You face to face.