binge eating

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It's like a confession, my dirty little secret. I threw up again, just brushed it away put on a smile and hit replay. It never happened that's what I say, until I look in the mirror
“You are a bloody glutton, aren’t you” Café au lait irises, dilate like the peak of a coca rush.  Cinnamon skin — suddenly torched cherry red, on my apples of my cheeks.
Some of you may say I'm a nutter My tongue is smothered with peanut butter Like a newly-shined shoe, no area is left untouched However, this coating should have stayed in my lunch
What am I? a balloon, stretched taut over a fauct and filled til bulging then filled and filled some more Like a teddy bear, stuffed with cotton until the seams burst
having an eating disorder means wanting everyone to know and no one to ask it means accidentally leaving your lunch at home and proudly telling friends no thanks when they offer to share 
Sitting on my stomach burning the wet tissue.  sadness fills the void. never good enough, not anymore. hating self-control 
It eats away at me It is my arms It is my tree trunk legs I can hear my lips smack together I keep eating
You look in the mirror, you poke and pinch, turn to the side, suck in, wish you could lose just one more inch. You swear up and down you've already eaten, by "skinny thoughts," you already feel beaten.  
I have an addition problem, I must admit. 1 means one more, and 2 is spelled t-e-n. 30 is basically twenty-nine, And anymore feels like shit.   But this is not a decrypting test,
You sit across the way and stare at me as I fight my temptation to give in. Fulfilling my yearns and granting each plea, you make me feel so great, it must be sin. You give the contents to fill what I lack,
Mirror, mirror, on the wall Who's the fairest of them all? She who's tall and she who's thin, She who gets a workout in She whose thighs are far apart, She who has an ice cold heart.
The thing about ED is He never leaves you Through the good The bad The ugly He's there A little wasp Following you around Stinging you Every time you reach out
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