As I lay in my bed

In the darkness of my room,

My thoughts drift over

And review my life.

 

Living with my parents for the past 19 years,

All the hopes, dreams, aspirations and tears

Scrawled on the walls of my room

Telling me all my eventual doom.

 

I shut my eyes and hold my breath:

Perhaps sinking under water would be best to

Accept this death that we call life.

 

Adulting is hard.

 

To be a child again would be so easy:

Transported by the hands that carry you day in,

Day out,

When you fall asleep on the couch

And magically wake up in your room;

 

I yearn for that type of magic.

 

Perhaps that magic isn't gone yet.

 

Perhaps the young me hasn't used it all up yet,

 

I bet

 

If open my eyes and stare at my ceiling

I should be able to remember those feelings

That I had when I was little.

 

Perhaps I'll find the magic.

 

Maybe the magic today isn't as visible as it was before,

But it sure isn't as miserable

Anymore.

 

Let's think:

 

When everything is amazing,

 

Those are the days that we're just grazing -

Lazing around in the late evening sun,

Awaiting the moon to crawl up and sing us goodnight.

 

But.

 

When everything is falling apart,

 

That's when we find the silver coin on the ground

When we're so busy trying to stop the tears from falling -

Skidding on the surface,

Feeling worth less

Than ever before.

Awaiting the moon to crawl up

To curve our bodies under the covers and sleep.

 

Perhaps this is magic.

 

When we are still able to wake up the next morning

From the hardest day before,

And continue

With who we are

And what we do.

 

That is when everything is amazing.

 

As I lay in my bed

In the darkness of my room,

Moon singing its lullaby,

My thoughts drift over

And review my life.

 

My eyes close with heaviness

Thoughts lifting the corner of my mouth

 

Perhaps the life worth living now

Is the life that is amazing.