You told me who I was,
Made me work just to belong.
You told me what I thought,
And then convinced me I was wrong.
You say “It never happened,”
Now I’m questioning my sanity.
You made me apologize,
Just to gratify your vanity.
I never made mistakes.
You called them acts of resistance.
So I learned to lie about my failures,
And regret my own existence.
A new day brings fresh hurt,
Reminds me that I’m nothing.
Your knife’s been dull for years,
But that won’t stop your cutting.
Did you know what you were doing,
When you sabotaged my soul?
True you gave me life,
But it’s not worth the one you stole.
Still I have to wonder,
Am I sure you’re truly bad?
You’ve given me enough,
To make me doubt the thoughts I’ve had.
You’ve been calling me delusional.
I think I’m starting to believe,
That all I really knew,
Was how to misconceive.
You can call me crazy,
Or tell me no one cares.
But I choose to trust my mind this time,
And listen to my nightmares.
You seemed good from the outside,
Most people do.
But I remember what was on the inside,
Each molecule you put me through.
They say it’s never easy,
To learn you grew up in the dark.
At least I have your gaslight,
And its tender lifelong mark