Dear 14 and 15 and 16 and 17 and 18 and 19 year old parents,

Please. Gather with me and listen.

I expect intelligence, I know many of you are not stupid.

I'm weary of those who I've noticed are not so much so.

Please, do not take this ballad as a slam against you, my lovely young parents.

It is a slam against those who are not mature enough to parent.

For every Facebook selfie of a teen mother hold her baby while she's barely dressed, pursing her lips in duck formation

Those, those are what makes me lose faith in humanity.

The general stupidity of those who procreate by accident.

You see, I am the product

of a teen pregancy.

It is no excuse, I assure you, for stupidity.

Adieu, my loves.

Stay strong and speak and encourage good words