They say they know depression

Say that it can be fixed with pills and medication

Say it's a disease that's has a simple scientific cure

But depression is just letting the truth sink in

That everyone will die 

That I don't matter

I can't make a change

 

People say they know me

They know my forced smile

They know my fake kindness

But they don't know me

They don't know what a struggle it is to wake up

To function

To be "the girl your are"

 

My mom says she knows me

She knows my fake "I love you"

She know my forced kisses

But she doesn't know me

She doesn't know the pain I feel when she screams at me

The pain I feel when I hug her

The pain I feel when she forces me to smile 

To be the girls she thinks I am

 

They all think I am the perfect girl

Always happy

Volunteer Work

Check

Free Hugs 

Check

Cheery smiles

Check

 

I am not the girl you know

Look at me and look at me closely

You will see the sadness in my eyes when I talk

The hatred in my eyes when I kiss you

The happiness in my eyes when I am in pain