I am a living, breathing contradiction.

The minute I open up my mouth and say something in Español

I become a freak show

Because a person so white, with a face so narrow and eyes so light

Couldn’t possibly identify as anything more.

I am a living, breathing contradiction.

Every day I cross simultaneously between two borders

Pero no me puedes negar lo Santillán

My cherished Latina roots intertwine with my veins, my heart, and my mind.

I can’t hide them. Although it might appear that I can.

I am a living, breathing contradiction.

Not one or the other. Alone these just

Don’t do my mother justice.

Don’t do my father justice.

Don’t do my intersections justice.

Don’t do the smile I wear on my face justice.

I am a living, breathing contradiction.

This imperfect fit makes me who I am.

No need for explanations or justifications

I am worthy of love and understanding.  

I am not a contradiction and never will be.

I am a living, breathing, and beautiful human being