This is not facetious 

or sarcastic 

because this thank you 

is heartfelt and 

True 

because 

to say thank you to a drunk seems counterintuitive 

and yet 

you were the biggest influencing push 

in my life. 

The drunk who’s stayed by my side saying  

“I’m here for you” 

Smelling of Yeager. 

Thank you seems counterintuitive because 

you Hurt me, 

you Scared me, 

you made me Fear men, 

You made me Fear the Contents of a person's Glass more than words and intentions 

... 

And yet I learned more from you than I did from anybody. 

... 

I thought you were loud and tired when I was young, and  

I learned 

I never want to skip on my naps or I’ll sway when I walk 

And I never want to be so loud that I scare my sister to  

the point 

that she  

Peed her pants. 

you don’t remember because you were drunk but, she did 

she peed her pants 

in Fear 

of  

You 

... 

Thank you for showing me that 

I never want to be that loud or that tired and 

I’m proud that 

 I never have. 

... 

I remember the name Jim Beam and now that I’m an adult I can’t help the 

Revulsion 

of seeing Jim everywhere 

because you told 

Me 

My sisters 

My mother 

That you would rather Jim Beam’s company over your family 

You would rather Jim Beam than a warm meal and comforting hugs. 

You showed me how the contents of a  

Glass 

made you Isolated and Lonely and Blameful. 

And I blamed Jim before I saw who was 

at 

Fault 

... 

Thank you 

Because of that 

I knew that I never wanted to be so attached to something in my  

Hands 

rather than my 

Head 

Heart 

or my Home 

… 

Home 

I knew that as I got older Home was no longer a place where I slept or ate. 

That place you stayed was a roof that I frequently visited. 

undesirably so 

Thank you for making that place so unwanted 

Because 

It pushed me to look at other  

Places, Things, Persons 

differently.  

I made my Home 

Elsewhere 

I had more than one. 

Home was the adventures of libraries, 

The peace of drives with mom, 

Parks with friends that felt warmer than any heated bed, 

Mentors that taught me passion 

And Myself 

... 

I saw Myself. 

I saw Myself in your eyes. 

What you saw was something that should have been grateful for even  

a glance 

a 

huff 

a 

sneer, 

Even for a comment that felt like a slap. 

... 

Now I see 

Myself 

develop into everything you weren't 

Because you showed me everything, I never wanted to be 

And for that 

I 

Thank you.