Started with wonder

excitement and dread

Began with hopes

and dreams all dead

Learned of new problems

personal and abroad

Sick close relatives

once living, now not.

Some still holding on

still striving,

still breathing,

but that doesn't ease the pain

and the courage escapes me.

As the year goes on

more stress is piled on

on top of the stacks of books,

worries, and so on.

More and more time passes,

failed expectations,

disappointed glances.

Arguments everyday between my parents

shouting, screaming, yelling,

you name it.

I keep falling asleep,

too lazy,

too tired.

Always ready to shift the blame to others.

Never motivated

always just there.

Just trying to get by,

with my parents proud faces.

More time passes by

with new friends and new faces,

life starts looking up a bit more

as a gain more patience

The next thing I know some faces are gone

off to college to become someone.

And as I sit in silence and write this poem

I wonder why I didn't do this sooner.