After sixteen years, seven months, and 20 days of living

I’ve realized my biggest vice is not loving too much.

Yesterday I

Realized it lies in that

I expect all the love back

I want it all back

I wanted reciprocation like an equation

And I equated it everyday until the day itself turned gray and I realized with love, I prayed for

More

and More

Until my atoms in cells went sore

And into cells they soared until I could feel no more.

After sixteen years, seven months, and 20 days of living

I have realized patience is a virtue.

Today I

Resisted the urge to yell

To permeate hell through c02 to one person,

Because it would reach you and every other person in current existence

Anger is persistent, but never transient

See, you say one thing and that person feels like shit

And that shit can be smelled from any distance

And the smell reaks of ele in the population of the formerly self-assured

But there is a simple cure

Rested breaths and doubted benefits

Thoughts, pure.

After sixteen years, seven months, and 21 days of living

I have realized my self-worth.

I can be rash, bitchy, and overly insecure

And I will never be Marilyn or Dior

And I will never have hair that will reach the floor but

I have a witty tongue,

It can be an arsenal, it can be fun

I’ve got this mind that won’t stop talking about walking the equivalent of my distance from the sun

And then some.

I am a nebula wrapped in nutella skin,

Contained by the chagrin of the human condition

I’m the sympathizer for daydreams and days that seem to be spent with Jah and end in hahas,

I can love you out of consciousness

I can detest you until rest seems out of the question,

But the question will never again be

How much I love me,

Because I know I love Jah with everything.

After sixteen years, seven months, and 22 days of living

I have realized that these humblings will not be sparse

Knowledge is a garden where supposed spontaneity grows my food for thought

Where thoughts form and are made to be understood

Languages are all cognates and everything is good

It took me sixteen years to

Realize.