"go bring me my pencil or you're gay" says he to his friend in art class

his friend zooms across the floor to get it because being called gay is the worst thing in the world

i want to pin him to the wall and punch him until his teeth fall out or jump up on the table and yell in his face

"shut up! you're the reason i'm scared to be me and i hope you suffer because of it!"

because he deserves to feel a pain worse than the one i do

"i know. totally gay, right?" says my friend to me, completely unaware

later that week we're talking and the topic comes up and i swear i can hear a tinge of remorse in her words when she asks me "so what are you?"

"faggot" says the kid next to me under his breath

it is directed at me and it is terrifying

i can just feel some part of me shattering deep down like i'm made of glass and he just threw me to the ground

"i identify as an attack helicopter" "you're such a faggot" "shut up, homo" "stupid dyke" "i wish i was asexual. that's like when you have no emotion" "that's so gay, dude" 

every day is like a slap in the face, a constant reminder that anything except the default is bad and wrong and disgusting

and still, my eyes go wide when i hear them in the halls, the classroom, the kids around me who have no idea that

the very people they hate so much exist alongside them