His smell lingers

I used to be quick to cleanse my body

But I’m hesitant to rid myself of him

I want his fingers to be imprinted on my skin

I want to remember the feel of his body on mine

Scarily, I want to remember his mind

I want to remember his answer to the universe's secrets 

I want to remember the way his hands moved as though his words came from his fingertips instead of leaking through his lips

I don’t want to remember his chest against my back

I don’t want to remember his words of intellect that gave me the illusion of walls breaking

I don’t want to remember that I expected him to hold me close after 

I don’t want to remember that I expected him to want a kiss goodbye 

I don’t want to remember that I expected anything from him other than his hips against mine