Pause
Pause in the mirror
Stare into the heart attack waiting to happen
Smack flab lost in the caramel center
Drunken slurs slosh and slip from innards thrown outwards
Take inventory: Cinnamon Toast Crunch, an old bunch of grapes
And enough alcohol for ten apes
Pause in the mirror
Mouth agape
"You stupid piece of shit, you said you'd never get drunk"
Spit, tears, and dribbles of hydrochloric acid dangle on the chin
"Look me in the eyes" a disheveled dirtbag who stares back
Looks like he smokes crack and dabs acid
Or grabs asses on a train, lets the other guy get slapped and laughs at him
Cold flaccid, no heating in this house built for three
No tree to breathe, no infantry or child bearing mother covered in blankets
"She left you"
Pause in the mirror
Turn around to punch the devil, only hit the metal bar that holds the towel
Bleeding knuckles punch again into the drywall
Left a hole
"Stupid piece of shit, you can't afford anymore"
Figurative or literal the guttural utterances stumble over the shower curtain and into the tub
"Scrub the sin off"
Scald the shower on "Hotter than the hell you deserve"
"You filthy perv, chasing after every hourglass curve"
"Every silk skirt, and every woman who would let you put yourself first"
Grabbed bleach instead of shampoo, ammonia instead of soap
Mixed them both in the water collected
Lungs infected now with the cloud of mustard
Flustered, froth and foamy blood curdled forth from within
"Bask in the sin, and your boiled skin"
"You stupid"
"Piece"
"Of shit"
Wake up in a cold sweat
Walk to the fridge, see all the beers I haven't drank yet
Walk to my daughters room, see her sleeping in the crib
Walk into the bathroom
Pause in the mirror
Say aloud "Maybe you're not a piece of shit yet"