My Sister's Guitar

 

I cant play any instruments

But sometimes ill take my sister's scratched up guitar she brought home from college

And hold it so close to my chest.

Let my thumb gently pass over its chords

Trying to make sense of its oddly soothing sounds.

 

My fingers play in erratic rhythms 

Every stroke vibrates from the its wooden  

back to the depths of my chest

Vibrations sent in the hope they will find something in vacuum of my rib cage

Like a rippling pool i can feel each stroke send encrypted signals to the end of my spine

Closely followed by unknown triggers of tear reactions

That strangely make me smile

Every vibration resounding in my clenched heart  until it finds it memory

Of beating to the sound of my sloppy melodies

 

I hold this guitar so close to my chest

I aggressively hit its clear plastic strings 

Till i feel my finger bleed and sting

Like CPR this is my DIY  resuscitation , 

College kids don't have money for therapy 

No, so we find an affordable fix to our melancholy 

 

I can't sing but all i want to do is serenade this girl

In the warm corner of some students ' house party.

Croon a soft melody about the way her eyelash,

 brushs the top of  her eyelids every time she laughed

Tell her  how her back acne reminded you of childhood games that made me happy.

 

But who am i kidding

I know the second i see you  my feet will turn into pudding  

And all the words i meticulously choose to say with touch of sarcastic flair 

Will disappear into the air , as i open my mouth ill let out all the innocently stolen

Vibrations I swore I wouldn't let escape again .

 

I sometimes i tell myself a bedtime story

About how love saved a lonely prince from losing all of his glory

Convinced  that affection is the cure for the pain

Caused by my eviction from mother's holy womb.

 

Well here is my  daily scoop

Strive to find your calm 

Before you let yourself fall.

Tonight i take to my rest 

With my sister guitar held to my chest

I'll dream of peaceful waters and warm breezes 

Till i find the path to love myself.

Note: Hi, i wrote this 20 minutes ago  so do be kind. I am a beginner and looking for

any and all constructive criticism.