I wish i've never felt it,

I wish I never knew it existed,

It's a drug, the one our parents told us not to do when we were kids,

How could I have missed it,

It didn't look like it could do any harm,

I didn't think it would make me feel this empty

When I first fell It never crossed my mind that this drug would one day leave me.

Now I'm stained,

I'm stained with this feeling this one thing that can make it all better,

Now I'm in pain,

because I feel like I will be searching for this drug forever,

I don't want to smoke it,

I don't want to inhale it,

I don't want to inject it,

no, I just want to feel it,

Not alone, I don't want to be single handed here,

Im looking for a drug that considers me as much as a get away as I consider him,

someone maybe something that wouldn't leave me in tears,

someone who will not only love me back but will always be there,

It's hard,

I wanna fall but I'm scared on what I'll break,

how long the concussion will last,

the risks I would take,

could end up a mistake,

and lead to heartbreak,

It could end up escalating to something called hate.

Women tell themselves constantly they don't need a man,

They go on with their lives and act like they don't give a damn,

But yall got it all wrong men isn't the drug,

this thing we women crave, something we can't control,

Is falling in love.

 

- Malasia Johnson