And I drank water

not to quench my thirst,

but to repel my hunger.

And I writhed 

when someone

made me eat.

And I couldn't mask

the feeling that

something was eating me

from the inside out. 

So I didn't eat, only drank

and only thought

and only watched

and only cried

when my body started to shut down.

And only

if only

I could stop

Idolizing thin,

and start idolizing 

Me.