Luis Angel Vargas by: Luis V

My father promises me so many things

Promised me an Iphone 11 never got it

Promised me a visit to him on christmas 

Never got it until the last day he was in Florida before he went back to Virginia

Now if I do have kids

I do not want you near them 

I do not want my kids to go through the same thing 

 I am going through now 

I hate you I tell myself

But I love you at the same time

I cry myself to sleep because of the hurt you caused me to have

You broke my heart 

You tell me I am going to see you next time every year

But I never do

At this freaking point I gave up hope on seeing you again

I never want to see you again

I don’t even want to see you this Christmas like my mom is planning

I wonder why are you my father 

I ask myself why does he only call on Sundays after church

My heart feels pain 

It hurts feels like my demons won the battle between me and my dad

I feel like I gave into the hatred they were handing me as a present 

I hate you dad 

I don’t like you 

I don’t want to see you ever again

Your the last person I would want to see

You are not going to see your grandchildren

Until I fully heal 

I don’t even want to talk to you on Sundays anymore after church 

I don’t even know why you are trying to crawl back into my life now 

Where were you when I needed you the most 

I’m done with you goodbye dad 

I freaking HATE YOU.