Lost Ones

Mon, 04/08/2013 - 20:59 -- armara


United States
33° 51' 50.634" N, 118° 10' 35.8644" W

(While you sit here and look at life it is all a surprise for us to synthesize on everything and everyone who has us memorized every goal you uphold from every significant individual has you confused and amused because life is full of the unexplained muse that no matter of the thoughts or the clues you will have a bigger chance of something to lose theres very few out there that can conclude full satisfaction with life but most are lost with everything at cost theres not enough time in this lifetime for anyone to explain out the norm the answers that will have us torn)

Guide that inspired this poem: 



You've kept a pretty consistent flow throughout this poem, which always makes for a smooth read. However, your choice of words makes this poem hard to follow.

For example: "it is all a surprise for us to synthesize on everything and everyone who has us memorized"

Synthesize means to form by combining elements. I do not believe this word makes sense in the context you've placed it.

Although your intention may have been right when using the word, its meaning does not coincide with what you may have been trying to say. I recommend using words within your vocabulary that you fully understand. Doing so will give your poetry more meaning. If you combine words within your level of understanding with your amazing rhyming skills, you'll have jumped several levels in awesome! :)

Thanks for sharing!


interesting way to write a poem

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