A chemical imbalance 
I am skeptical
Is that what they call the
dark wave flooding my brain
with words that scream
slit cut jump pop and pull?
Am I okay?
Ha! I now ask myself the 
question that so many others
have asked me.
I am already standing on the
wire. Dare me to "slip"
The world is full of liars
And I am one of them
Euphoric laughs hiding
distant cries, damaged 
cracks and creces cover
the mold of the mask I wear
each and every day.
Help me I am lost
I find the light and then disappear
into the darkness once more and 
once again
Useless words, pitiful actions
I do not speak up when asked
intellectual questions because
my answers are meaningless
It is all a game and I am tired
of faking it, Pretending to be
this friendly, smart person
when I shrivel at the thought
of interaction.
But I am not satisfied alone
in this home.
So I bounce back and forth
from Red to Black and back.
You will never find me,
even if you find out,
because I will hide
behind a jaded
smile.
You can't see
past my crooked
teeth and watery
eyes.
My pain is invisible,
like the thoughts that
haunt me day in and
day out.
But you don't know
about that,
and I doubt that you
ever can know
the truth that hides
behind this body
and this mind.