I'm not over you

Sat, 09/24/2016 - 22:20 -- jxxh

I'm left alone, searching for a distraction. 

I remember the taste of your lips, how your hands felt grazing my skin,

I remember you saying you could lay beside me forever. 

Then you told me about her. 

I guess you have a type. 

Shy smiles, dimpled cheeks. Bad taste in men. 

 

You're with her, slow dancing to the sound of a slow country song and I'm left watching you smile.

Your arms are wrapped around her lower waist, 

Your nose crinkles like it always does when you smile,

and i'm reminded that I was never actually yours, and you were never actually mine. 

I'm dancing, dancing in front of you when the two of you are wrapped around each others fingers,

I'm catching your eye every so often,

and im smiling with my hands in another mans,

but all I'm trying to do is make you see that if you couldn't trust yourself with me,

then why are you with her. 

 

I'm realizing you're probably not getting jelous,

and that this was a stupid attempt to make you miss me.

My body is spinning around another mans, all while I'm seeing you, 

you're looking at me, and i'm looking at you.

Are you happy?

Who else listens to you talk about your blood pumping,

or your body shaking,

or your lights flickering,

or your grades slipping,

all at three o'clock in the morning now?

 

I'm looking at you,

while I'm being spun around,

I see you glancing from your girl to me,

and all I can wonder is if you were really meant to be.

If you couldn't trust yourself with me then why are you with her?

I need to get over you.

But even if another man lays his lips upon my skin,

all I can think about is how I can't wrap my fingers in his hair,

like I did yours.

Or how he shivers when I kiss his neck just like you did.

And how he doens't pull away while I laugh into a kiss.

Just.

Like.

You.

 

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