i remember what it felt like
to feel.

when red was a
heart, still beating,
and blue was your eyes,
not the color of the waves
holding me under,
pushing me under,
helpless.

i remember what it sounded like
when you said my name.

every syllable was honey,
every drop
golden,
every consonant,
vowel,
sound-
every second of my name
on your lips
like heaven.

i remember what it felt like
to hold you.

remember when you
would tell me you felt fine,
tell me there was
no way to help you,
tell you i was wasting
my time
on you.

where are you
call me back

i would have wasted an eternity.