I just wanted to write and say, in case you ever wonder or are filled with regret
Or in case your heart decides
to change after asking for forgiveness
Or in case you go to your parole officer who finds you aren't quitting your bad habits and you are carried swiftly out to a cold cell of handcuffs and cruelty and I never see you again- I just wanted to say,
Goodbye my friend, my dear and former friend. I just wanted to confess how much I trusted you before I learned to sleep with a locked door thanks to a shared space with you.
Thank God I was made to be strong through which I grew and could see my needs, and thank God I buried you into the back of my mind where nothing comes out again.
And yet, it's unfair, isn't it?
Our memories will always be there they don't ever really go away.
Trauma is like a scar: It's permanent. And even the hurt I thought was gone still flickers in my eyes. Like lightning while swimming in the sea I am alone with no land in sight. Right in the despair waiting for sharks to arrive and eat my memories