Growth Of The Bitter
This rage of my screaming pain
I writhe in my own agony of the stains
The stains it has caused in my mind and oh so many fabrics
The blood stains of bitterly depression
I get yelled at and told I have an obsession with hate
But they raised me and it’s not too late
It will never be too late for me to change my own fate
I know that I am capable
Yet I hate that everything about me is so reprimandable
It’s a constant battle in my head
I can barely find the motivation to go or get out of bed
But fuck me for feeling this way right?
It’s not like its a chemical imbalance in my head that's locked airtight
I wish I could book a flight so I could escape
I know that there are many that can relate
And yet none of us understand our own mental states
We’re told to smoke weed or take antidepressants
We’re told to cover up and do our best to ignore our mental infectants
Even when we leave we still get used
Even when we fix our lives they just magically forget how they abused
How they abused, how they acted upon abusive tendencies many times
They pretended that they never caused anything in our heads
They “forget” what they did to cause the tear stains in our beds
They say they’re proud when really
All they care about now is that they don’t have to care about us with “sincerity”
The only thing that matters to them is that they can ignore us even more
But never will they forget me when I break my demons and leave them behind with pouring rain
NEVER WILL I BE FORGOTTEN WHEN I BREAK MY BARRIERS TIME AND TIME AGAIN
And never will I forget the stains left by my past
For they are what made me strong enough to prove that ones like me can last