Growing Up
All I ever wished for was a home
It was hard growing up
Food was scarce and so was love
I felt my heart slowly turning cold
I was only nine when suicidal thoughts began to roam through my mind
However, I’d seen my mother struggle for so long
So one night, as I stared in the mirror, tears rolling down my eyes
I promised myself I wouldn’t give up
No matter how hard it got
When I was 13, I began my first job
My father’s bills weren’t going to pay themselves
Neither would his pills
I didn’t seek anybody’s pity though
They wouldn’t understand
How lonely so many of my nights were
They wouldn’t comprehend
If I told them about the monsters in my head
That didn’t just show up at night
but hunted throughout the day
How nobody was ever there to chase them away
Or to tell me that everything was going to be okay
Piles of hatred and rage built up in my heart at such a young age
My mindset was always different from my classmates’
But growing up wasn’t really a choice
My family was poor, we had it rough
I’d seen way too many doors close
Rather than making excuses
I persevered
God, he made a way
Where there was no way
He made a diamond out of dirt
For his glory, it was worth it