this is not romance, she thinks 

she sees the world in its barest form learning all of its secrets and nuances and

believing that 

in essence 

everything 

truly 

was black and white

and the gray was just a cover. 

she stripped him naked like she did everyhing else

trying to find out if he was black or if he was white

this was necessary for her 

things had to be categorized compartmentalized classified des-ig-nated-

it felt like falling, being with him

fear and euphoria the difference between happiness and surviving

absolutely no way to go back

heart pounding palms sweating 

and the strangest strongest urge 

to scream.

for joy or exasperation, she never did know

or could decide. 

it started with a smart-ass comment 

and he wasn't black or white or gray to her. 

he was all the colors

and the ocean was in his eyes.