I'm silly and maybe a little sleepy and definitely a little soiled

with the ins and outs of the day and the thrill of not getting caught

Do you read these? I mean, my whole brain spills out on a plate and maybe no ones eating

I stress over nothing sometimes,

I once spent a month wondering if reading young adult novels before 7th grade might send me right to hell

So late nights spent thinking  about a boy can't be so different from adultery, ya know?

I stress over nothing sometimes,

I once took the stringent affection of my rents for granted, now I love it and I hate it, ya know?

I don't want to make them hate me so if there's a scarlet letter on me I try to hide it

But there's someone else I'd die before disappointing

I think he likes me and I think he craves me and I think he's something like a miracle

So, I know I suck for calling, but not calling

For texting, but not texting

For making sense, but being confusing

For writing everything in free form and for loving you but not acting like it

That last thing hurt to say

I know I suck for my damn inability to be everything I want to be for you

but I'm just me

I miss you like the stars went out.