Free

Free 

I wonder how many beds you’ve slept in to forget me .

How many moans you’ve suffocated with the fear of screaming my name .

How many times you’ve tried to rewind my laugh or my smile .

Or the way I said I love you .

Do you miss the way I gifted you those three words ?

Wrapped with all the love and gentleness I had  in me ? 

Leaving nothing but vulnerability and honesty . 

Our love captivated my mind 

I have risked ethereal damnation for you 

The original sin

Held your boxer wearing hands as they slid over daddy’s ruby red covered pews 

You could have shown me the way to hell and I would have been happy to tag along .

Just as long as I saw your illuminating smile through the darkness 

It was the begging of my demise .

I tried so desperately to care for you .

Gave you the deepest and darkest  parts of myself . 

And like any pyromaniac it wasn’t enough .

You consumed every part of me with what you presented as love .

But it was just Fascination

Wrapped in curiosity 

When the fire had finally burned it was through me 

All I was left with was bones 

Forced to pick up the pieces and fix the mess you made

Piece by piece I have built myself from the ground up 

Learned to smile without it thinking it belonged to you .

Learned that I was charge of my body and whoever I left in it .

Never again will I let you described myand own my temple . I’ve learned to stop allowing peasants into my garden or ended . 

They simply don’t know how to treat it .

Or treasure it .

If you can’t tell by now , I am over you 

Over sadness 

Over us 

So in the words of my people

Free at last 

Free at last 

 

This poem is about: 
Me

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