Die Trying


United States
34° 6' 3.582" N, 117° 49' 9.912" W

An infant; innocent, pure, and optimistic.
Supported by all those around them
Attention here and there,
smiles that come from everywhere.
She tells you she will love you forever.
The palms of your hands are inseparable from hers.
The softness in your coos are her world.

A child; mischievous, curious, and an explorer.
They begin to loose interest.
They find something else to grow fixated on.
The little things-awards, pictures, and notes are not important anymore.
She holds you every once in a while-but she would rather yell.
You wonder when did it go down hill?
The last time you held her palm was when you lost your last tooth.
Your coos no longer mean the same things.

A young adolescent; a pest, a nuisance, and a waste.
You feel your lungs compressing-a lump in your throat forms.
What is this awful feeling?
Why has she stopped caring?
Where did everyone go?
Suddenly the awards, pictures, and notes are a distant memory.
Suddenly the yelling is the only thing you hear.
Suddenly everything is your fault.
Suddenly you're alone.
When did this become your responsibility?
When did you stop being proud?
When did you decide to stop wanting me to achieve?
When did you decide to crush all of my dreams?
When did you decide that I was worthless to you?
When was our last embrace?

A mother should be faithful to her children not a monster.
A mother should be the one to motivate her children to accomplish their dreams.
A mother should not let you down.
A mother should not discourage.
A mother should not verbally abuse.
A mother should not shoot down all of your hopes with one phrase.
A mother should not do any of these things.
I may have a roof over my head, clothes, and food;
but I do not have love.
I would rather live a life of extreme poverty instead of a live of extreme emotional insecurity.

When will my mother be proud again?
When can I get out of here?
Where is my salvation?
College. College is my salvation. my opportunity to find refuge.
To explore the unknown.
To be who I want to be.
To be someone other than a b***h
To be someone who doesn't need your negativity.
To be me.
To be happy.
To find my true home.

Guide that inspired this poem: 



Wow I am literally crying this poem was amazing

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